A lot of my friends talk about being single. And most of the time it is easy for me to join in the conversation... the gripes... the struggles... the freedoms... the fun...
But mostly I have to say that they gripe. True it isn't easy and I have my days when I feel life is moving on without me. But I also know that God has been extremely faithful in bringing me friends that meet my needs at each critical point in my life when I could not do it alone.
So this is not a gripe. It is for all my single friends who need encouragement and maybe a tool or two. God plopped an article down on my desk about a year an a half ago and it has really changed my thinking on what my focus should be as a thirtysomething single woman. Fortunately I kept it around and found it in a cleaning frenzy a couple of weeks ago. So I thought I would look it up to see if it was online so I could share it with more people... and it was. So this is my link to articles for singles http://www.lifeway.com/lwc/archive_main_page/0,1702,M%3D50019,00.html
the article that helped me so much is split on this page into three articles... twentysomething, thirtysomething, and fourtysomething.
Enjoy a little reading and who knows... maybe you will find another article that may help you find peace or speak to your specific gripe.
4 comments:
SOme of the article was good but the suggestions at the bottom were definitely oriented toward females with money to spend--
go to the spa?
the opera?
In my mind the advantages of being single:
1. freedom with time
2. my money is all mine
3. freedom to go where I want
4. less conflict
5. nobody bossing me around
you get the point...
disadvantages
1. no sex
2. no kids
3. no second income
4. less respect from others
5. lonliness
all in all I think it is just hard for a lot of us because our goals and our dreams were not about what job we had or where we lived, but about being a good mother or father, a good husband and wife. And when you feel called to that and it is not happening....
I didn't think the suggestions were limited to female. While money helps to make those things happen, you can do it. It's a priority thing. I don't have a lot of money, but you can make it if you want. If I don't treat myself, who is going to? Sometimes my friends do and that is awesome. But dang it, I'm worth it. I have been to the opera and the symphony and the theatre and sporting events and the movies. Typically these are with my other single friends, but we're all having a good time.
Thanks, dear friend, for sharing this and for finding joy where you are. Somedays are indeed easier than others.
Ok Friar, I will give you that some of the suggestions were female oriented... however, use your imagination and fill in the blank with something you would love. Perhaps going to a Seahawks game or something that you would love to do. I tend to travel or go to a favorite bookstore.
And to agree whole heartedly with our rubyslipper friend... a wise friend once counceled me... you should do something nice to yourself at least once a day. And even if it is a coffe from my favorite coffee shop... it has helped me. And she is right... if we don't do it for ourselves no one else probably will.
Great entry! You're speakin' my language sista. I agree with the friar of the advantages and disadvantages. But as a wise friend once told me "gambate"...I'm probably slottering the spelling, but it's Japanese for "keep fighting." Press on and be thankful for all that He HAS given us. There is MUCH to be thankful for.
Bitterness, loneliness and self-pity are the biggest battles for me, and I combat it with memorizing scripture...satan can go back to where he came from b/c God's won the battle and I am COMPLETE in HIM!! I also am intentional with making and maintaining close girl friendships.
I agree whole heartedly with the article about fulfilling your dreams and/or making some. Traveling, paragliding, running (don't gag Carrie), fishing, and picking up new hobbies like knitting and playing the flute again help fill me up and bring me JOY!
Blessings on all you fellow singles!
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